Anker Susan. Real Essays with Readings with 2009 MLA Update
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147
You Know This
When you tell what happened, you
are using narration.
• You tell a
friend about
what you
did over the
weekend.
• You talk about
the life of a
celebrity you’re
interested in.
Understand What Narration Is
Narration is writing that tells a story of an event or experience.
10
Narration
Writing That Tells Stories
FOUR BASICS OF GOOD NARRATION
1.
It reveals something of importance to you (main point).
2. It includes all of the major events of the story (primary
support).
3. It uses details to bring the story to life for your audience
(secondary support).
4. It presents the events in a clear order, usually according to
when they happened.
In the following passage, each number corresponds to one of the four
basics of good narration.
1 My guardian angel made sure I got to the interview that changed
my life.
2 I went to bed early on the night before the most important job
interview I have ever had. I felt that getting this job would be the best
thing I would ever do, and I wanted it with all my heart.
3 I had laid my
clothes out for the morning, and I had checked my alarm clock twice to
■ IDEA JOURNAL
Write about the most
important thing that
happened to you this
week.
4 Events in
chronological
order
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WRITING ESSAYS
148 Part Two • Writing Different Kinds of Essays
make sure that I would wake up in plenty of time to get ready and get to
the interview on time. Everything was set, and I had no reason to worry.
2 At 2:00 a.m., I sat bolt upright in bed, absolutely certain that I was
going to lose my electricity, the alarm wouldn’t go off, and I would miss
the interview. 3 It was a mild spring night, with no chance of high winds,
snow, or lightning — the usual sources of power failure. Nevertheless, I
knew I was going to lose power.
2 I was so certain that I called my mother right then and asked her
to call me at 6:30 a.m. because I thought I was going to lose my electric-
ity.
3 Groggily, she muttered, “Are you crazy? Why do you think you’re
going to lose power?” I couldn’t really explain, and she thought I was just
nervous about the interview. But she agreed to call me. Satisfi ed, I went
back to sleep.
2 I was sound asleep when the phone rang hours later. 3 My mother
said, “I am your wake-up call, you worrywart.” When I looked at my
clock, it was dead: I had indeed lost power. I told her and then asked
what time it was. She assured me that it was only 6:35, and I had plenty
of time. I had to go to her place to shower and get ready, 2 but I got to
the interview on time, got the job, and, as I thought, changed the course
of my life. 1 Since then, I’ve never doubted the existence of my guardian
angel.
Telling stories is one important way in which we communicate with
one another. Whether they are serious or humorous, stories provide infor-
mation and examples that can show, explain, or prove a point.
You can use narration in many practical situations. Consider the
following examples:
COLLEGE In a U.S. history course, you trace, in your own words,
the specifi c sequence of events that led the United States
to enter World War II.
WORK A customer becomes angry with you and lodges a com-
plaint with your boss. You recount — in writing — what
happened.
EVERYDAY Your wallet is stolen, and you fi le a written account with
LIFE the police reporting exactly what happened.
■ DISCUSSION
As a class, generate
other possible uses of
narration in each of
these three areas.
4 Events in
chronological
order
■ For an example of
an actual narration
written for work, see
page 156. The piece
was written by the
journalist who is
profi led in the box
on page 155.
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WRITING ESSAYS
Chapter 10 • Narration 149
Main Point in Narration
Whenever you write a narration, you should have a purpose in mind,
whether that is to explain what happened, to prove something, or simply
to entertain someone. If you don’t know the purpose of your narration,
your readers won’t know it either.
In addition to knowing your purpose, you should also be clear on your
main point — what is important about the narration. Generally, college
instructors will want your main point to indicate what is important to you
about a story. Take another look at the passage under the Four Basics
of Good Narration (p. 147). What if the main point had been stated as
follows?
I lost electricity one night.
You might respond, “So what?” This statement doesn’t promise a very
interesting story. Now read the actual statement of the main point:
My guardian angel made sure I got to the interview that changed
my life.
This statement emphasizes the event’s importance to the writer. You need
to express your main point clearly in topic sentences (for paragraphs) and
in thesis statements (for essays). Topic sentences and thesis statements
usually include your topic and your main point.
Topic + Main point = Topic sentence/thesis statement
My guardian angel made sure I got to the interview
that changed my life.
Although writers generally reveal the main point either at the beginning
or at the end of their narration, we suggest that you state it in the fi rst
paragraph and remind readers of it at the end of your writing.
Support in Narration
The support for the main point of your narration is the presentation and
explanation of the major events in the story, as well as details about those
events. Your point of view determines how you present these events and
details.
■ For more on topic
sentences and thesis
statements, see
Chapter 5.
■ For online exer-
cises on main point
and support, visit
Exercise Central at
bedfordstmartins
.com/realessays.
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WRITING ESSAYS
150 Part Two • Writing Different Kinds of Essays
Point of View
In a narration, the events you include and the way you describe them
create a story that is based on your point of view. For example, two people
who witness or participate in the same series of events may give very dif-
ferent accounts, because they perceive what happened differently.
The stories that Gloria and Mason tell in the following two paragraphs
refl ect their different points of view regarding the same experience.
GLORIA’S STORY
This morning, Mason and I set out for what was supposed to
be a great day at the beach, but Mason’s stubborn behavior ruined
everything. First, he took the longest route, so we hit traffi c that we
would have avoided by going the short route. Then, we got lost.
When I suggested that we stop and ask for directions, Mason refused.
After another hour of driving, we passed an intersection that we’d
crossed earlier. I again suggested that we stop and ask for directions,
but Mason wasn’t buying it. So we drove some more. Finally, we
were about to run out of gas, so we pulled into a gas station. While
Mason was fi lling the tank, I asked the attendant for directions.
I swear, if we hadn’t needed gas, we’d still be driving around looking
for that beach!
MASON’S STORY
This morning, Gloria and I set out for what was supposed to be
a great day at the beach, but Gloria wanted to pick a fi ght. First, she
insisted I was going the wrong way, it was going to take us longer, and
we’d hit more traffi c. Then, she decided we were lost. I knew where we
were going, but Gloria kept on nagging me to stop and ask for direc-
tions. When we were almost there, I decided to get gas, and she had to
ask the attendant for directions. I don’t know what was going on with
her, but she was really on my case.
When you write a narration, be careful to describe events in a way that
will tell the story you want to tell.
■ ESL: Ask students
to describe any events
they see differently
from their classmates
or coworkers because
of language or cultural
differences.
■
RESOURCES
To gauge students’
understanding of
main point, support,
and other writing and
grammar issues, use
the Testing Tool Kit
CD available with this
book.
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WRITING ESSAYS
Chapter 10 • Narration 151
Major Events and Details
The major events of a story are your primary support in narration, and
they will usually become the topic sentences for the body paragraphs in
your essay. Ask yourself what the major events are and what makes them
important. To help your readers experience the events as you did, give
supporting details that bring the experience to life.
For example, one student stated the main point of an event in the fol-
lowing thesis: The theft of my wallet this morning showed me how easy it is to
be deceived.
The student then did some listing to come up with the major events
and details about those events.
MAJOR EVENTS SUPPORTING DETAILS
(primary support) (secondary support)
Woman bumped into me Light bump, but she dropped
her folder of papers, and they
scattered
I bent down to help her collect Wind was blowing, so I had to
the papers. work fast
A man stopped and asked if I didn’t get a good look at him
he could help. because I was trying to get the
papers, but he stood close to me
and hung around for a minute
just watching us. Then, he just
left without saying anything.
Woman thanked me, and I said She had her head down and
no problem walked off fast.
When I went to get coffee, I broke into a sweat at the café
I realized the wallet was gone. and had that horrible panicked
feeling.
I realized that the man and Looking back on the details, it
woman were working together. was clear how carefully they’d
planned the scam.
■ For more on
supporting a point,
see Chapter 6.
■ For more on listing,
see page 69.
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WRITING ESSAYS
152 Part Two • Writing Different Kinds of Essays
Organization in Narration
Because narration tells a story, it uses chronological (time) order. Start
at the beginning of the story, and describe the events in the sequence in
which they occurred. See the chart on the left for an overview of the steps
in this process.
Time transitions (see the box following this paragraph) are important
in narration because they make the order of events clear to readers. Writ-
ers of narration use these common transitions not only within a paragraph
to move from one detail about the event to the next but also between
paragraphs to move from one major event to the next.
■ DISCUSSION
Choose a general topic,
and have the class gen-
erate sample sentences
for the introduction,
body, and concluding
paragraphs using the
list of common time
transitions above.
Introduction with
thesis statement
Says what’s
important about
the experience
First major event
Details about the
event
Second major
event
Details about the
event
Third major event
Details about the
event
Conclusion
Reminds readers
of the main point
and makes an
observation based
on it
NARRATION
AT A GLANCE
Common Time Transitions
after eventually meanwhile soon
as fi nally next still
at last fi rst now then
before last second when
during later since while
Read and Analyze
Narration
Before writing a narration essay, read the following three examples of
narration — from college, the workplace, and everyday life — and answer
the questions that accompany them.
Narration in College
The following essay was written for a college writing course. The assign-
ment was “Write an essay describing an important decision in your life.”
■ For more on
chronological order,
see page 100.
■ For more on
transitions, see
pages 135–37.
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WRITING ESSAYS
Chapter 10 • Narration 153
A RETURN TO EDUCATION
Jordan Brown
1 For me, college has been an experience marked by anticipation,
fear, and pride. I sometimes fi nd myself still surprised that I am really
here. The journey to get here has been a long one, but if I can put my
fears behind me, I believe I will be able to accomplish something that I
can really be proud of.
2 Finally being able to go to college is something that I have been
anticipating for many years.
Since I left high school and the California
Bay Area behind, I have been on the go in one way or another.
A
fter
graduation, I felt that I wasn’t ready for the commitments or respon-
sibilities of college. Instead, I enlisted in the army. T
he army provided
me with the maturity and self-discipline that I desperately needed in my
life; h
owever, being in the army also provided me with very little time or
money to go to college, so I put it off until “a later date.”
3 After the army, I sought a higher-paying job, fi rst becoming a truck
driver. T
his job provided me with money but no time. N
ow I work for
the railroad, and with my apprenticeship behind me, I have some free
time for the fi rst time in my life.
4 What I have been anticipating for years is fi nally here. I now have
the time and money for college, but do I have the ability? It
has been
eleven years since I last sat in a classroom. T
his made me question
myself: Can I do this? Will I succeed? Will I fail? Am I even capable of
learning in a classroom environment? A
lthough I had these questions, I
knew that the only way to face my fears was to attack them head-on. I
reminded myself that the only thing I could do is try.
5 When I fi rst walked into Front Range Community College, I was
nervous.
I couldn’t help but notice how young everyone looked. I
got to
my study skills class, sat down, and looked around. I
felt out of place.
M
ost of the people in the class looked as if they had just graduated
from high school. When we did our introductions, however, I learned
that one of the women sitting across the room had graduated from high
school eleven years ago. I started to feel a little younger.
PAUSE: What are
the commitments
and responsibili-
ties of going to
college?
PAUSE: As you
read the next
few paragraphs,
think about how
your experience
compares with
Jordan’s.
■ For more examples
of narration, see
Chapter 43.
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WRITING ESSAYS
154 Part Two • Writing Different Kinds of Essays
6 When I got to my philosophy class, I watched the other students
come in and noticed that not everyone looked like a kid. T
his class
looked very much like an American melting pot, with students of many
ages and cultures. A
s we went around the room introducing ourselves,
I felt very much more confi dent about my decision to try college. M
any
students were even older than I was. A
woman sitting near me, who
looked about my mom’s age, said she was in college because all of her
kids were in college now. She told us that she wanted a college educa-
tion and a better job. A
n older gentleman across the room said that
he was a business executive from Germany. His job had become bor-
ing, and he was looking for something more challenging.
By the end of
the introductions, I was convinced that this “college thing” might just
work.
7 Since I have gone back to school, there has been a lot of pride sur-
rounding me. M
y parents can’t stop talking about me and how proud
they are. M
y family and friends are excited for me and congratulate me
on my decision. I
am also proud of myself for making the tough deci-
sion to go back to school. I
know that when I get my degree, I will have
something to be truly proud of.
8 I still have fears and uncertainties. But I also have positive anti-
cipation and hope. Now, I know that I am on the right course. I know
that as long as I have stamina and determination, nothing can stop
me from achieving my dream of getting my degree in mechanical
engineering.
1. Double-underline the thesis statement.
2. Underline each topic sentence/major event.
3. Put a check mark () by the supporting details.
4. Circle the time transitions.
5. Does Jordan’s essay have the four basics of good narration? Be ready
to explain your answer.
6. When you started college, was your experience at all like Jordan’s? Why
or why not? If you were meeting a new student who felt as Jordan did,
what would you say to him or her? Answers will vary.
PAUSE: Recall in
detail your fi rst
college class.
PAUSE: Are your
friends and family
supportive of your
going to college?
■ TEAMWORK
Have students work on
this activity in pairs.
■ For a list of the four
basics of good narra-
tion, see page 147.
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WRITING ESSAYS
Chapter 10 • Narration 155
Narration at Work
The following profi le shows how a journalist uses narration in her work.
BACKGROUND: I was the oldest of six children, and before my mother
married my stepfather, she was on welfare. She homeschooled me for
fi ve years, from grades four through eight, until I begged her to let me
go to a public high school. There I made friends with some people who
expected to go to college, and I realized I wanted to go, too. I started
at Green River Community College, but just then my parents’ fi nancial
situation got really bad, and the eight of us had to move to a trailer.
I stopped going to school and fl oundered for a while, until I met my
future husband, who was going to a community college and encouraged
me to go back. I enrolled at Highline Community College, and several
months later I became pregnant with my fi rst son. I was determined
to stay in college, so I continued and ended up completing one year at
Highline. That summer, I had my son, got married, and found loans to
transfer to Pacifi c Lutheran University with my husband. While there, I
received one of the fi rst Gates Millennium Scholarships, which made con-
tinuing college possible.
Although I moved a few times, I graduated from college and went on
to graduate school. After I fi nished graduate school, I had another son.
About two years ago, my husband, children, and I moved to Virginia
for my husband’s job. A few months after we got there, he was called
to active duty and deployed to Iraq, where he spent the next fi fteen
months. Although he was wounded, he returned home safely.
COLLEGES/DEGREES: B.A., Gonzaga University; M.S., Syracuse University
EMPLOYER: National Military Family Association
WRITING AT WORK: I have done many types of writing for many kinds of
audiences. When I worked in marketing at an accounting fi rm, one of my
jobs was to rewrite material the accountants gave me so that it would
be appealing, clear, and simple. When my husband was in Iraq, I wrote
a newsletter for families of soldiers with advice on fi nding resources
and keeping up morale and with news of what was going on with the
soldiers in Iraq.
During that time, I had to fi nd my own resources for military families,
and it’s not easy. I had to write well, speak well, and be persistent. Even
when you don’t write for a living, you have to communicate effectively
to get what you need in life. Words give you the power to fi ght for what
you want and need. Everything you’re learning now, you will need later.
HOW MONIQUE USES NARRATION: Much of the writing I do involves telling
people’s stories so that readers can understand them and their unique
problems.
Profi le of Success
Monique Rizer
Journalist and
Development
Associate
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WRITING ESSAYS
156 Part Two • Writing Different Kinds of Essays
Monique’s Narration
The following is an excerpt from an article, published in The Chronicle of
Higher Education, that Monique wrote in her profession as a journalist.
VOCABULARY
The following words are italicized in the excerpt: fi dgeted, postpar-
tum, intangible. If you don’t know their meanings, look them up in a
dictionary.
WHEN STUDENTS ARE PARENTS
1 Crammed behind my desk, I fi dgeted and shifted my eyes to observe
the other students in the room. I tried not to look the way I felt — like I
didn’t belong there with them. I couldn’t help noticing that all the other
women were wearing shorts, sandals, fl irty summer dresses: appropriate
clothes for a warm September day. I tugged at the baggy clothes hiding
my postpartum weight. I thought of my six-week-old son and hoped I’d
make it home to nurse him at the scheduled time.
2 It was the summer of 1998. I was a twenty-year-old new mother and
wife, and it was my fi rst day of class, though not my fi rst day of college.
I’d begun my long journey through higher education three years before,
but my plans to attend full time after high school graduation were put
on hold when fi nancial diffi culties forced my family of eight to move. I
then found a local community college and felt prepared to start again,
but instead the registration papers sat abandoned in my car, where I
practically lived since home was a 32-foot trailer fi lled with seven other
people. In the summer of 1996, I packed my bags and left to live on
my own; I enrolled again the next spring and had my son in July 1998.
I knew I had to stay in school and go full time. I wanted more for my
son and myself, even though I wasn’t sure what exactly “more” was at
the time.
3 That commitment to fi nish college has paid off. Now, I have a bach-
elor’s in journalism from Gonzaga University and a master’s in informa-
tion management from Syracuse University. During my years in school,
my son kept me focused and ignited my ambition to be a better student.
In my experience, there is no better motivation to fi nish college and to
appreciate the full experience than a child whose future depends on
PAUSE: Have you
felt out of place
in college or other
places?
PAUSE: How
do you think
Monique found
the strength to go
back to school after
dropping out?
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