Women
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The medieval lady’s education varied in place and time. In the early pe-
riod, while literacy was uncommon and while barbarian invasions kept sur-
vival as the primary focus, very few women could read. Only the daughters
of some kings such as Charlemagne learned to read. By the 11th century,
most upper-class girls were learning to read. They needed to read in order
to amuse and educate themselves and to keep their husbands’ accounts
when they were in charge. Many girls learned some form of music and
dance. They learned a strict code of manners: how to greet, converse, and
eat, as well as how to handle diffi cult social situations. The lady’s role in
public was to appear beautiful and serene and to give no sign of trouble if
she was anxious or unhappy. A lady’s stressful face might give away her hus-
band’s secret troubles.
The condition of widows varied greatly. In some places and in some eras,
a widow had few rights. In 12th-century England, unless a widow bought
back the right to raise her children and give them in marriage, they were re-
moved, regardless of age, and placed with a guardian. Guardianships could
be sold several times until the child came of age, so many widows tried to
buy back these rights. In England, they automatically received one-third of
a husband’s estate to keep, but no more. In other places, they could retain
the whole estate and live with independence, or they could return to their
family’s home to be cared for or remarried.
The image we have of the medieval lady is a fairy-tale construction
blended with truth. Most upper-class women led diffi cult lives, although
they were surrounded by luxury. Their marriages were often unkind, since
they were matched on the basis of land, money, or power. But they lived
on a plane above the noise and dirt of the classes below them, and they left
behind an impression of magical elegance. Some of this image comes from
the romances and troubadour songs. Many romances told the stories of
beautiful, refi ned, intelligent, sweet ladies who won the love of kings and
knights and who suffered for this love. While some real ladies led such
lives, most did not.
Women in towns had fewer restrictions than castle ladies. They worked
hard, starting in childhood, but had more control over their own destinies.
Some town girls became apprentices on their own, in some eras and places.
More often, girls helped in the family trade and then helped their husbands
in their trade. Wives worked next to their husbands in all kinds of crafts,
and the craft guilds made exceptions for wives, daughters, and some female
servants to work in trades that were generally barred to women. Widows
often carried on a husband’s craft or business.
Cities included a wide range of material wealth. Some women in town
were servants, living in a back room of the house and never earning
enough to move into anything better. These women tended (and breast-
fed) babies, cleaned, washed, sewed, and did all the laborious work of a