114 THE PERILS OF SANTA: NORTH POLE IS SAFER THAN A LARGE STORE
75 about 80 from a field of nearly 600.
Macy's takes up to 22 of these. Basi-
cally, Mr. Cohen looks for someone
with a kind heart and thick skin. He
notes that "there are easier ways to
so
earn money" than spending a month
as Santa
Claus.
Minority Clauses
Santa candidates needn't be
plump or old or even male. Macy's has
85 long had at least one female Santa
every
year—dressed
in
full
beard.
The
main qualification is a deep voice.
This year Macy's has one woman
Santa: 98-pound, five-foot two-inch
90
Albina
Vurro,
who says she is "just
tickled pink" with her new job.
Western also hires Santas of vari-
ous ethnic and racial backgrounds. It
isn't always easy to find them, though.
95
When
the New
York
office
this
year
sent circulars to such groups as the
Negro Actors Guild of America and
the Association of Hispanic Arts, no
one responded. Ads in actors' trade
100 publications were more successful.
Marshall Field's downtown Chi-
cago department store, which hasn't
hired its Santas through Western, has
never had a
nonwhite
Santa. "We
105 haven't had any apply," says Homer
Sharp, a vice-president. Says Mr.
Cohen: "We are conditioned, unfortu-
nately, that we live in a white man's
world."
110 This prejudice carries over to
Santa's visitors. "If parents insist, we
do direct the children to the
'right'
ethnic Santa," says Jean
McFaddin,
Macy's special-promotions director.
115
Macy's
this year has black Santas and
Santas who know sign-language greet-
ings for deaf children. If confronted by
a disgruntled parent or child, West-
ern's nonwhite Santas are told to just
120
say that Santa comes in all colors and
quickly move the child on.
Although some Santas just jump
into a suit and improvise, Western's
recruits are tutored in the nuances of
the trade. "This is really an expert's
business," Mr. Cohen says. "We aren't
street Santas; we're professionals."
At a recent half-day session
here,
two dozen mostly scrawny Santas
were lectured on the subtleties of
t»
proper pillow placement and learned
some do's and
don'ts.
Don't eat
onions at lunch. Do wash your beard
in
Woolite—frequently.
Avoid being
seen with other Santas in public. Even
t»
if kicked in the shin, never make
un-
Santa-like
remarks.
There are plenty of reasons for
Santas to turn grumpy. One hazard is
the backache, or "Santa
sacroiliac,"
i«
caused by repeated lifting of lads to
laps. And there is always the over-
excited tot who inflicts "diaper rash of
the knee." Mr. Cohen advises: "If you
get the
'royal
christening,'
call over 145
your elf immediately."
One longtime Santa in Dayton's
department store in Minneapolis got a
christening he won't forget. The
Santa, who works off-season as an
150
investment analyst and prefers to
remain anonymous, once greeted two
"parents" who persuaded him to pose
with
their
fully
clothed
chimpanzee
for a photo. Everything went smoothly
155
until the flashbulb went off, and then
the chimp went ape. Ripping off
Santa's beard and losing control of its
bodily functions, the animal shrieked
almost as loudly as the frightened
elf
160
behind the camera. The line had to be
closed off for nearly
an
hour for a thor-
ough scrubbing.
A Truck Accident
Another Santa, in Denver some
165
years ago, was approached by a boy
who didn't get what he wanted for
Christmas. The boy promptly crowned
Santa with a metal toy truck. Santa
needed stitches.
170
Youngsters' requests can be sur-
prising.
At a New
York
Gimbels
store,
Santa Sam
Cardona
asked a teenage
boy what he wanted for Christmas. "I