Games and hobbies
Then there were outdoor activities like:
skiing, skating,
surfing, canoeing,
horse-riding, wind-surfing,
parachuting, hang-gliding,
mountaineering, pot-holing,
roller-skating, skateboarding,
water-skiing, hiking,
camping and shooting.
My friends all told me they were great fun. I enjoyed the occasional picnic but my
favourites were indoor activities like:
fruit machines and pin-tables,
table football and video games,
pool, darts,
skittles and bowling.
We can't all be outdoor types.
21 to 25
Once we went hunting together, all red and white -
red for the jacket, the fox, the blood,
white for the teeth, the trousers, her face.
That started her on a year or two of anger and protest:
meetings, demonstrations, placards and posters:
'Down with whatsisname,' 'Stop the whatsit',
'Hands off thingummy,"Soandso out!'
Meanwhile, I began gambling:
£20 bets at fantastic odds of 10 to 1,
winnings of £200 plus my stake money back, if the horse that I'd bet on had won.
She then gave up politics for dress-making -
'You can't go wrong if you follow the pattern.'
I flirted with gardening - fun for a week -
'Sow in boxes, in moist compost, plant out carefully, water daily.'
Then I turned to alcohol, brewing my own beer,
distilling my own whisky, making my own wine.
She did basket-weaving, then pottery for a while:
handleless jugs and unusable vases,
while I tried my hand at carpentry.
I was in danger of becoming a do-it-yourself fanatic when,
suddenly and gloriously, I fell in love with cars.
After my love-affair with cars, what else was there left?
On and off, there was:
fishing - apparently the most popular outdoor pastime in Britain. Happiness for
millions is a rod and a line, a good catch on the hook.
playing bingo - a strange phenomenon, a party game with gambling, and lots of
prizes.
newspaper competitions — 'And this week, YOU can win any or All of the Prince's
wedding presents!'
yoga, jogging and keep-fit classes - 'Touch your toes! Don't bend your knees!'
Cartwheels, forward rolls, somersaults, press-ups.
Anyone who can do all that must be made of rubber.
And, of course, TV
and ante-natal classes, and then:
Nursery Rhymes
with Mummy and Daddy
Humpty Dumpty
sat on a wall,
and Once upon a time
there was a boy called Hansel.
Fairy Tales
with Uncle Paul.
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